How Tidying Up (KonMari Method) Allowed Me to Learn More About Myself
I know so many people have probably heard of “Tidying Up with Marie Kondo”…if you haven’t I suggest that you do!
I had first heard of the KonMari method via Lauren Ash in 2018, I believe. I did quick research and I think I tidied up a little bit. I was already in the space of releasing when I saw the show on Netflix and I literally fell in love with Marie!
I decided to focus on my clothes because #1, that is what I have the most of in my living space (we are already essentialists/minimalists) and it was about that time to let go of the clothes that no longer served me, energetically and physically.
The first step in the KonMari method is to take out ALL of your clothes and put it into one area then go through each item of clothing one by one, hold it in your hands, and if it sparks joy, you keep it, if the article of clothing does not spark joy, you thank it and release it in love! When I took all of my clothes and put it on the bed, I will not lie, I felt embarrassed! My mouth dropped open. How the heck did I have that many clothes ESPECIALLY when I haven’t purchased clothes in so long nor did it seem like I even had a lot of clothes. How could I be a minimalist/essentialist when I had a HUGE MOUND of clothing on my bed???
What I realized was that I had A LOT of clothes, but most of what I had did not go with each other. So many clothes were given to me or even thrifted, but they were not in relation with each other, nor were they intentionally added to my wardrobe. Also, I had so many clothes that I had purchased 5-7 years ago. AS beautiful as these clothes were, they were not a representation of who I am now.
I took a deep breath and began to touch my clothes one by one. Some things were easy to let go of, others were not. What I realized was that when it came to clothes I was still operating out of a lack mindset. I had so many clothes that were functional, but did not fit into the category of clothing that I wanted to wear as an adult. There were so many pieces that were beautiful, or that fit, but they just did not represent who I am now.
The day before, I had, unconsciously, decided that I would only have 8 colors in my wardrobe. Staple colors: white, cream/oatmeal, grey, black + vibrant colors: mustard yellow, mauve, olive green, & a burnt clay. Burgundy would probably be included in my winter wardrobe. This helped me to decide what was staying and what was being released. Even if I liked or even loved an item, if it didn’t fit in my color palette, I would let it go.
I had such a hard time departing from certain items because my mind was telling me “what if you need that in a few months!?”, “but you can totally wear that because it keeps you warm and it is definitely winter time!”, or “if you let that go, you are NEVER going to find something like that again and it is not in your budget to be buying things to wear like that!”. I noticed that my brain was still thinking in a “poor” mind state. I wasn’t thinking of how much something brought me great joy or how amazing I would feel in it, I was only thinking of what would happen if I let the clothes go.
It was brought to my attention that I was holding on to clothes and shoes because of their potential. Being a visionary, I could see how good I would look in those boots. I could see how that dress would make a picture pop. I could see all of the possibilities with everything. I didn’t want to let go because of how something could be instead of how it is now. Let me say this, I BARELY GO OUT OF THE HOUSE. What would be the real purpose of keeping clothes that I might one day wear? I really just wanted to keep my clothing options open and not feel restricted in how I could express myself when I actually got dressed and went out.
That was when I got emotional. As I saw how much clothing I was giving away in love, my mind tells me, “look how much you DON’T have now, how are you supposed to go out in ONLY these things? You don’t have as many clothes to choose from now, you’re going to feel so restricted.” I love clothes so much, but what was the REAL purpose for me having clothes? Really, it was for others to approve of me whenever I actually left the house. I had to really convince myself that the amount of clothes I have literally didn’t determine my worth as a person, as a spirit.
I will say that my wardrobe isn’t exactly filled with clothing that I envision myself wearing, but it is WAY closer to the vision. Everything that I have kept really makes me happy and gives me that fuzzy feeling in my body.
I think my favorite part of the whole process was the folding. The way the items are intentionally folded and then arranged in a drawer makes my OCD mind bubbly with joy! I find myself not wanting to mess up the visual appeal of my drawers so I make sure that everything stays neat.
My partner later did the KonMari method of tidying with me and all together we released so much! It was mind-blowing how many things we were giving away because we literally couldn’t tell that we had so many things. We could have opened a whole storefront! A serious WTF moment for both of us.
My second favorite part about the tidying experience is that I had my friends come over and go through what we were giving away in love and take ONLY what sparked joy for them. They were genuinely so happy with what they were able to receive. I heard excited shrieks and shrills. I heard so many “wow’s” & saw so many eyes widen. THAT made me feel good, to be able to give people I love things they needed or wouldn’t have been able to get on their own. The smiles on their faces made it so worthwhile!
I have to say that this experience of tidying up taught me some amazing lessons. And the OCD freak in me LOVED how organized everything looked! I had so much room left, like two whole drawers just empty. What made me feel even better was that I didn’t feel like I needed to fill them up with more “things” aka random clothes. I will definitely be keeping this practice up for life!
Here are some final photos.
***I originally wrote this on January 13, 2019 and failed to publish it swiftly. Since then, a lot of changes have happened and we are no longer in the space pictured. IT was a bummer because I really loved this method of tidying and keeping things tidy. We will just have to use this method in our travels!